In the midst of it all

I’ve been meaning to come to this space for quite some time. I did, after all, commit to #20in20 – twenty posts to my blog this year. Well, we’re 106 days in. (Could be 107 by the time I click publish) and I’ve managed to post just once.

In the midst of it all, of starting a new job, acclimating to life working in an office and in schools during the week and juggling children’s schedules and trying to find me time (laugh-a-ble), I just didn’t find time to write.

I wanted to, though.

Things were going really well. Enjoying my new role immensely. My OPDC team at BCIU is amazing. I found myself involved in some truly meaningful projects, and I’m so thankful for the opportunity to serve our county’s schools.

In the midst of enjoying this new adventure, the pandemic arrived.

And the last several weeks have been a blur. I’m not a classroom teacher, so I can’t begin to empathize. But I am spending most of my time each day building digital content and sharing live with teachers in our county because our job continues to be to provide professional development and support to the teachers in our county. I have comfort in this space, and for that I am grateful, while certainly other members of leadership teams and teachers do not.

In the midst of it all, when I stop to breathe and reflect, the guilt comes in. My kids are 4 and 7. They have online learning tasks of their own to complete, and I have very little time to sit with them and make sure it’s happening. We’re finding other opportunities to learn and play together. And the house is a mess and I don’t pay attention to the dogs and will I ever consistently exercise and get out of this desk chair and will the amount of time my kids spend on iPads make their brains implode? Probably not, but in the midst of it all, that’s what I worry about.

My worries are nothing compared to the worries of families who don’t have incomes, or food to eat, or shelter, or access to health services. I get that. We’re designing learning opportunities for teachers knowing not all of their students have internet access, or devices, or time, or space, or support, or the safety, to learn from home.

We’re just continuing to do what we do because it’s what we need to do. And we’re doing our best, in the midst of it all.

I hope you’re well, too. And remember how much you mean to all the people around you, and that your best is always good enough.


PS. It’s now day 121. 15 days to finish and click publish. Sigh.


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